I was sitting on a Faded sturdy wooden chair, bar graffitied with mostly drunken banter, and a view that is in the process of being snatched up by massive companies that know people will pay out the ass to be there. I was having a great conversation with my friend Kyle from Whistler who has been living in Cambodia for the last six months in what can only be described as a beach paradise on earth. Sihanoukville has everything you could want, pristine beaches, relaxed lifestyle, amazing people, great social scene, remote islands to die for and so much more.
Perspective is an insanely powerful thing and travelling helps you gain new perspectives daily and by the end of this article I will reveal to you in simple terms how to live the dream and find paradise in a paragraph or so but first continue to focus on these words because this is a story. One very interesting perspective comes from when I hear people use the phrase “live in the real world”, what the hell does that mean? I”ve heard it quite a few times in my day and it seems to go hand in hand with the expression “You”re living the dream” coincidence? I think not. There are two type of perspectives that come from two very different types of people when you use the expression “live in the real world”. The first group are associated with the negative mostly, these are people who view people who travel, follow their dreams, live a lifestyle contrary to the norm and think it”s a phase and it”s not normal. I think living the dream is a phase because your dream always changes and when it does so does my reality so I”m constantly seemingly living the dream or struggling and making steps to get there once again. This perspective comes from people mostly too afraid to step outside of the box, to do what they actually want, basically they are afraid and that”s ok because living the dream takes guts there”s no doubt about it but if you truly want something go get it. I hear so often “man I wish I could do what you”re doing” “sounds so amazing I wish I could do that”, and I”m always thinking in my head, well why the hell don”t you?
The second type of person views the expression live in the real world with humour and for me a bit of sadness. It”s funny to people who are doing what they want whether they are travelling, they have had success following their dreams, or live an incredible lifestyle of their choosing because they”ve heard the expression from hundreds of people who don”t understand their dream enough, believe in them enough, or have a dream of their own, so they ever so slightly and condescendingly use that phrase, and we giggle. We giggle because we are in the real world you twits, we are just in a world we absolutely 100% want to be in. We choose our realities, we choose to make sacrifices to live a life we are passionate and proud of, happy with, we are following our dreams. I found another paradise this week once again and it”s great to know I could spend a good amount of time here enjoying an insanely positive and enlightening lifestyle on a daily basis, when the word lifestyle is used and you look at your own lifestyle you simply need to shorten that word to gain real clarity if you”re doing well because it”s life, your lifestyle is the life you”re choosing to lead. The sadness in this perspective for me is I can see that people feel like they don”t have a choice, a way out of a life they don”t really want and that is the saddest thing in the world, they are slaves to themselves not totally free. Granted life is a real a-hole and it”s not easy but most people can make it a whole lot easier on themselves and I for one would prefer a life of repeated failures and struggle pursuing the things I want from life and my dreams than being successful in any avenue that wasn”t truly what I wanted.
You”re about to read the next words and receive a knowledge bomb that differentiates me from most people and the people living the dream and not, unfortunately you”ll probably read it and not fully internalize it but I”ll tell you anyway. THIS LIFE IS NOT PROMISED. You think you”re going to live forever? Hell no, have you every meditated on your mortality? The monks do and http://www.phpaide.com/forum.php?langue=fr&page=1 so I did and I can say it”s very profound, scary as fu$K to know you”re going to die, looking at death eye to eye is terrifying but after that comes liberation. I spent 8 years of my life snowboarding around 150 days per year and spending the rest either travelling or having epic summers in Whistler with my friends and all I heard was “living the dream” “NOT living in the real world” “living in the bubble” from outside perspectives, then I decide to do this trip I”ve always wanted to do so I saved like a basterd to do it, then I taught english to monks learned about buddhism and meditation, hiked everest, spend 6 weeks training full time MMA in thailand and now I”m on the beach writing this, all because I wanted to, because it was my dream and you bet your ass I want to live it and I won”t have it any other way ever because it”s my choice, it”s my lifestyle, it”s my life. Here”s the real kicker, here”s how I know I”m doing ok and it brings me back to death. Once again let me tell you this life is not promised YOU ARE GOING TO DIE and you don”t know when. If you can ask yourself these questions honestly and truthfully you”re doing good, you”re on the right track, if you can”t maybe it”s time for a new perspective. If you were to die today would you be proud of yourself? Did you do what you want? Did you pursue a dream? Did you try and develop your gifts? Did you do what your soul wanted despite what other people said or told you to do? I can say yes to all of these and that”s why I know i”m proud of myself and know I”m mostly on the right track, I wouldn”t have traded anything for my choices, my life has been fucking awesome because I decided first what I wanted most, then I went to get it! The unfortunate truth is many people will view you negatively and not support you following your dream because they don”t understand it and most importantly they don”t want you to succeed because they don”t have the courage to live their own and if you succeed they”ll feel worse knowing it can be done, so how do you do it?
I promised in the beginning of this article I would succinctly explain to you how to live the dream and find paradise, so here we go in rant form. The key firstly is perspective, wherever you are right now, in this moment, tomorrow, and the next decide mentally it”s paradise, be in the moment with your job, your current situation and be at peace with yourself. This is some monk stuff here but you”ll have the same issues in paradise as you do grinding a 9-5 job, but make perspective your bitch and always choose the positive one it will improve your life a great deal. The second thing is quite simple, find you passion and start living it, uncover what your dream lifestyle is and start making steps to get there, ask yourself what you love to do, and start making it happen for F sakes, you get one shot at life so why the hell wouldn”t you? If you want a family and a house and a simple life, get it. If you want to be an artist involve art in your life, if you want to travel save, if you want to relax save a couple G and visit any number of incredible paradises on earth and live for a couple months meeting people from around the world that all have something to teach you. If you have a gift develop it, if you have interests pursue them, get some real clarity about what you want in life and start actively trying to get there it”s as dead simple as that. Life is a real basterd sometimes and will throw you curve balls and struggles all over the place but that”s what we are here for, it”s the journey not the destination, and I can”t tell you how true that statement, after you achieve your goals nothing will change really, life will go on so enjoy the hell out of the struggle getting there.
To sum up this rant of a blog entry paradise is within and can be controlled with perspective. Secondly, continue to look within and truly know yourself, create a dream that is authentically yours, a lifestyle (or life) that you want to live, and then go get it with every part of your being while at the same time being totally grateful for where you are at every step of the way. Well it”s 9:19 PM my friend Kyle is barkeeping on this gorgeous beach 300 metres from where I”m sitting so I have to get back to . . .
a. NOT living in the real world
b. Living the dream
I know what perspective i”ll choose . . . .
“The common denominator between all people is death, our choices are our own, it is my sincerest desire you find the courage to live a life you are truly proud of” – Matt